My bed is cold. My husband and I have a nice, moderately sized queen bed. I have always liked it, as it was a wedding gift from his parents...but I never realized how incredibly cold it is and how incredibly small I feel when I am laying in it alone.
My husband (who I will just call DH from now on, for ease sake) is settled in at his training, working hard, sleeping in bunk beds. I'm at home, working hard, training our dog, and sleeping in this gigantic, abnormally cold bed. I don't like it.
That's what I've noticed so far these first two nights I've spent alone: nights are the hardest. Nights are when it hits you that your husband isn't actually there. During the day you get caught up in various things that need to be accomplished, or you call a friend, or you bake something (yes, I bake when I am killing time). You can't do those things at night.
It's frustrating, knowing you're exhausted but that you're just going to go to bed and have cold feet and hands all night.
They should issue "deployment socks" or something to us spouses who have to find a new way to keep warm these long months our husbands are gone.....I should market that....
Puppy sat by the door for three hours yesterday. THREE. I can tell she misses her daddy. She doesn't listen to me much either....it's a little frustrating.
I wish DH was here. So much happened just today that I can't convey in a letter or over the phone. I wish I could show him how ridiculous puppy looks with the head harness I had to get her for training classes. I wish I could have split that last piece of cheesecake with him at dinner (and so does my waistline). I went to celebrate his grandma and grandpa's 60th wedding anniversary today....how I wish he could have shared that with us too....
But he has duty to his men and to our country. and that's what I have to keep reminding myself, especially in those moments when I just sit back and say, "he really isn't coming home tonight"
On a side note, I drove DH's beloved truck today. I drive an itty bitty, semi ancient Nissan sedan. He drives a humongous, over sized, fire engine red, big as a house Nissan pickup. His is brand new. I had to drive 2 hours, so instead of risking my car breaking down on me, again....I drove the truck
and it's still in one piece. so there.
Deployment, by the time you are over, I will be a pro at driving that truck. So there you have it: another silver lining to this cold bed and this lonely wife. So far, not so bad.
Missing my husband, but always true.
The Faithful Wife